Mountains Ahead

Dolores Park on a warm fall day (Ingrid Taylar)

The Bay Area's hallmark late summer seems to have come at last, three days before the official beginning of autumn. After fog and wind all summer, it's been 80 degrees with warm nights and bright sunshine. It is a cruel trick for visitors to this region that our summer starts as soon as tourist season ends, indulges us for a month, and then gives way to a chilly fall. This morning, I took a minute to look out over the channel where the bay meets the ocean on my way home from work. Stunning. It does make up for missing the brilliant red and gold leaves of the East Coast. I sense that our sunshiny autumn will bring exciting change and mountains to climb!

Clean, white paint instead of baby blue/taupe/coffee.

At home, B has been hard at work to brighten up our ground floor apartment -- he loaded up the storage shelves that we built, which freed up some much-needed room, and then he painted two rooms by himself! We had chosen the colors many weeks ago, but he finally decided that he would paint before he starts work again. The bedroom was a pinkish-beige color; we opted instead for a more neutral golden-cream. It looks beautiful! The bathroom was a tiny, multicolored space with a bright yellow bathtub, so for that we chose a clean, white gloss. It looks like an entirely new place. Apparently, latex paint can take up to a month to cure, so we are camping in our living room for the time being. It's fun to have a makeshift studio.

I have managed to put our little Siamese on a successful diet (she was gaining weight due to her asthma medication), and she looks pleased with our place thus far. She likes to sit in the window seat in the sunshine, or else to guard our front door. I have also found a few minutes here and there to finally hang our pictures and put away odds and ends. Our living room is wood-paneled (including the ceiling), so after the exams I'm going to look a way to bring more light in.

B's delicious home-made whole-wheat flatbread zucchini pizza!

On the work front, B has been approved for his internship! I'm so glad he painted the house already. We were both surprised that he would start on a weekday, but apparently there was a motion to be filed this Friday, so they needed all hands on deck. My own lab project has been challenging, but I finally managed to sub-clone the gene I am working on, so my boss left for her conference on Friday a slightly happier woman. And of course, the boards are coming ever closer. I manage not to be nervous while actively studying, but when I'm speaking with coworkers or attending research meetings, there is a tiny undercurrent of dread always ready to claim my soul :) We (especially B) have been cooking and freezing up a storm in anticipation of my boards studying in the evenings and his working from 6 am -7 pm every day. The feline friend will have to find something to occupy her time with both of us at work all day! Right now, her strategy is to yell loudly anytime anyone approaches the front door.

I guard: No-one in + no-one out = happy cat.

Yoga Calm

I have renewed my yoga practice after a long time away from it. I find that the postures are so flexible -- pun intended -- because they can be meditation, strength training, a cardiovascular workout, or physical therapy, depending on how you do them. Right now, as I get stronger, I find myself very sore after a long (1.5 hr) session, but I hope that as I start practicing at home more regularly, it will be a source of comfort as well. I am currently doing Iyengar yoga, which is a very anatomically precise form of Hatha yoga in which postures are held for minutes at a time and props are used so that people whose bodies haven't adjusted or simply aren't as flexible can do the postures with good alignment and form. When I go to classes, I prefer Iyengar because the certification process for teaching is more rigorous than in some of the other branches, so I trust that my instructors have a good knowledge of anatomy, safety, and theory. Ashtanga is a more vigorous form of yoga that I have tried and enjoyed as well -- I do that at home when I feel energetic and want to sweat.

(And below): Indian Stamp series released in 1991

These different types of yoga are just variations on a central theme, which teaches that learning to move and shape your body in certain strict forms strengthens body, mind, and spirit. If you are tired, you can do restorative poses. If you are stressed, balancing ones. If angered over something, challenging twists or intensive flows can help you release the emotion. In traditional Vedic thought, yoga is also a physical prayer and way to union with the universal spirit which dwells in each person. I really do feel that it is a moving mediation, a workout, and a discipline. I suppose that is why they call it a yoga practice. 

It is strange to be an Indian-American woman learning yoga in the US. I sometimes am concerned about how others perceive me, as though I ought to have a better knowledge of yoga because of my ancestry! I realize that is silly, though. I do notice that the Sanskrit pronunciation of words does feel natural to me, likely because it is close to Hindi, which I heard often around our household (although I can only say a few words). Learning yoga here feels as though I am coming full circle in many ways, to be taught the American interpretation of an Indian practice. It helps me think about the parts of me that are Indian and the parts that are American, and how my family has moved from the old culture to a new culture as first-generation immigrants to this wonderful nation.

I have started a yoga journal -- a small, cloth-bound book I found at a bookstore closing sale (the closing of bookstores is another topic, too poignant to combine with this one). In it, I take note of which poses I did that day, any thoughts I had, and whether I sat for meditation. Sitting for meditation is a lovely, peaceful thing to do in one's day, but it can be challenging -- to sit comfortably, to still the mind into that deep, quiet place, and also to find time! But even ten minutes of intent meditation can feel as refreshing as an hour of other activity. I have not yet come up with a meditation routine or method. I have been told that when you are beginning, you should choose a method that is innately appealing, that engages your mind.

Although most meditation includes awareness of the breath, there are a few main schools of thought. There is mantra, or chant. This is the repetition of a certain phrase that carries significance and which acts as a vessel for your mind to calm itself, whether it is "Om mani padme hum," or the Hail Mary. Another type is lovingkindness, where you move from inward to others to the entire world as you project loving emotion. Still another is introspective, using the question "Who am 'I'?" to move inward and look down on your thoughts from above, so to speak. There is also imagery, such as gazing at an imagined flame with your mind's eye, drawing the details of it as a way to focus on something other than your thoughts. Finally, there is mindfulness, which is awareness of self, others, or the surroundings -- this uses the senses to move beyond the fleeting thoughts.

While I am very far from being able to practice all of this with any degree of consistency or reproducibility, and certainly have not achieved the daily practice I aspire to, yoga is a source of hope and calm that I am very glad to have rediscovered.